What's The Buzz?

I like to surf the internet and last week I surfed fox news and surprisingly they have articles 2 or 3 times a week where they talk about sex. Some of it is inane and somewhat embarrassing. Last week the article that made me pause was about vibrators. May I ask do we really need to be talking about a vibrator or the energizer bunny before my morning coffee? 

The article stated that you could now buy vibrators in the grocery store or any drug store. Trojan condoms are marketing them to be on the shelf right next to the condoms and they are sold as a line that is going to be couple’s vibrator. I could just see me asking my husband, “Honey can you stop on your way home tonight and pick up some milk and get me one of those vibrators and get me a big one will ya?”  

What is the buzz on vibrators? First off, it is embarrassing to be talking about them let alone buy them. Of course, I can imagine the girl ringing you up at the register, knowing in her mind what you are buying that for and then smiling at you with a devilish grin and right away, you want to confess to her that it isn’t for you; it’s for a friend. You would not dare tell her, “I am buying this for my husband and it is the new couple’s vibrator.” Now, the hard part comes where you have to look her in the eye with a red face glowing with humiliation and pay for the thing

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The article stated that vibrators should be man’s best friend….sorry lassie; Timmy is calling you! An electrical device to make women sing has replaced lassie as men’s best friend.  As I continued to read the article, it was instructing men to bring pleasure to their woman. Now that is a nice thought! For once, it should be about us women. I do think guys and the vibe should be best friends maybe like the dynamic duo. Of course, Batman and Robin would never make me smile with a silly grin or make me feel that good.  Of course, if you are like many women and you hear the word vibrator it makes us a little uneasy. Those loud obnoxious insufferable buzzing that can chip your teeth.  I now have a new kinship with my dentist. What about those horrible shapes that look like a dome shaped weapon. Have we really seen anyone look like that or with as much girth and can I be honest, do I really want anything that ugly near my Vajaja. The new vibrators come in different colors. That would be clever to have one in every color for everyday of the week. It reminded me of how mood rings work. Kind of? How about Hot pink today!  I feel so sexy! 

I guess the marketing people feel that you can now buy vibrators in the toothpaste aisle instead of feeling dirty and going to buy one of these in those creepy places where there are men in raincoats and they are leering at you. I don’t want to be that person who would be lurking in the back of one of those lude and shabby shops, you know where you drive by and the windows are blacked out.  I have never actually been to one of those shops, but in my mind that is the image I have conjured up and I think it fits

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In the article, it compared men to Obi-Wan Kenobi and to wield the vibrator like the light saber.  All I could think of may the force be with me! I thought of Princess Leia with Hans Solo giving up the good fight and how about R2D2 and C3PO that would bring an electrical surge to you. Chewbacca, well that would be like being with the village people and personally I think Chewbacca had a thing for Hans Solo.

It seems to be dubious at best, but at least for all you women who may try this with your partner at least know one good thing, there is no shortage of batteries in the world. If you do want a threesome, it could be you, your partner and the energizer bunny that keeps on going and going and going…

Wordless Wednesday - Healthy Heart

Wordless Wednesday ~ Indian Summer

Summer's End

When September arrives, it is official that summer break is over. It is bittersweet isn’t it? As of today, my children are back in school.  School began the third week of August for some kids and for a lapse in my better judgment; I thought that was just too soon. I know better now. Boy was I elated to have some time for me. The funny thing is I had no idea how to act. Talk about a fish out of water. My first thought was, what is going on with me? I sighed in relief I took a long look around and realized my house was very quiet and it was a nice not to hear anything but the outside noises of birds chirping and the cars driving down the street. There was no arguing no bantering of where we could go or what we should do or even what we were going to eat. I was in a place where there was peace all around me. I felt like a Zen monk I had time to meditate if that were my wish. I could do Tai Chi or even Zumba and not being peeked at, stared at, or asked in that I know all voice, “Mom, What are you trying to do?”  I whispered to God that I was grateful my children have a place to go and I have my life back again. I thought for the first time I could unwind and slowly let my sanity return to where it should be and begin getting back to a normal routine.  For the last eighty days, there was no such thing as any kind of routine.

I am now home and I am looking around. Today is about me. I am a free woman until I have to go to work and then as you know your time is not your own.  That is somewhat like summer break is with my kids. I am usually so thrilled when summers is here and bask in that feeling of having nothing to do and no more routines. I have come to the unpleasant task of telling myself that routine is good and it keeps me sane. There are reasons for rules or else there would be anarchy and that would make for an unruly life.  This past summer break all bets were off.  There were no rules enforced. I had begun a new job so the house was up for grabs. It seemed like those college days of eating anything and keeping crazy hours and those zany high jinks gong on. That was how it was all summer long. My kids had been crazy with stretching the bedtime hours and sleeping in on some days too. I paid for that broken rule big time. We did fun stuff where we had no schedules so we played games, watched movies, and there were a day or two that we stayed in our jammies all day.

I have to say today is the first day I recaptured my sanity. There are rules being imposed. It is fun to get up with the sun and eat a sensible breakfast and just being on a schedule seems to make me less crazy.  My kids have adapted and are more enjoyable to be around.  Those days of bantering are over for now and we are even smiling at one another across the breakfast table.   

Today, I actually was alone for more than several hours. I met a friend for breakfast and talked about adult stuff without having to worry about my children interrupting or telling me with their eyes how bored, they are. 

School can be tedious at times but I love that school has us all on a normal routine and gets me to enjoy my children in small doses.  It makes for happier children and a happy Mommy.

However, I am looking forward to next summer…

Wordless Wednesday - Women's Suffrage ~ Let's Celebrate! It has been 90 years since the ratification of the 19th Amendment, guaranteeing women the right to vote

Wordless Wednesday ~ Worry Free

In One's Eye

The other day at the store, while I was waiting to check out I overheard a 5-year-old little girl ask her Mom if she was the prettiest girl in the world.  The Mother laughed and said, to her daughter of course you are.  The little girl asked if she was pretty like all the little girls on television and the mother said, yes, you are the prettiest girl in the whole world.

I listened for a moment and smiled and thought all little girls need to hear they are beautiful but that mother telling her that she was the most beautiful little girl in the whole world was doing that girl an injustice. Isn’t it more important for us as mothers to think that not only are our daughters beautiful but to also to let them know that there is more than being beautiful in this world.  We are more than a pretty face.  We are more than our looks.   Looks are superficial. Looks as you look at magazines can be manufactured.  I want to teach my daughter that she is beautiful but she is also smart, funny, creative and growing up to be someone who she can be proud of and a great human being. These are things that I think every mother needs to teach their daughter that they are more than beautiful and more than having a great body. Let face it looks can be just that looks.  I want to teach my daughter that there has to be something behind the looks.  There has to be substance. We as women are more than looks, more than a pretty face. We can accomplish anything we set our minds to. We are not born to just look pretty and be eye candy for men.  I wanted to turn around and tell that little girl that yes, she was beautiful and what 5 year old little girl isn’t but being beautiful is not something to aspire to be. I also might add that beautiful women are aplenty.  There are so many beautiful women in the world and that is where the shallowness lies.  I remember growing up and my grandmother telling me that beauty is in the eye of the beholder.  I never knew what that saying meant as I was growing up.  I now know that my grandmother was very wise in giving me that advice.  She did not want me to just rely on my looks for anything in this life she wanted me to become a whole person.

For instance, what happens when we gain weight whether during pregnancy or just bad eating?   I have been there and am still fighting those pound that keep finding me but there is more to me than just my weight.   I am more than a pretty face.  I am well rounded (no pun intended) and smart, funny, compassionate, and a very positive woman.  My husband thinks so too.  I feel these are traits that will help me as I become older.  I will still be beautiful inside.  Aren't these some of the things you want to instill in your daughter?   How disappointing if you keep telling your daughter how beautiful she is and when she begins growing up that there may be a girl who is more beautiful, creative or smarter than she is.  What an injustice to little girls everywhere.

The message I have for my daughter is looks may get you in the door but you have to have something else to be able to stay after the door closes…..