Twitter Tatter Tweety Bird

I am not really into birds and not a bird watcher.  I know birds are an intricate part of nature and when I hear the birds, I know that spring has arrived

Birds make me a little nervous I think ever since I watched the movie “The Birds” by Hitchcock I have been a little freaked out by them.  That movie was scary!

Imagine it is about 4:30 am and you are lying in bed and you look at the alarm clock and think, “great I have another two hours before I have to get up”

Then it starts, a faint peeping sound, chirp, chirp, cheap, cheap, then it becomes louder Chirp, Chirp, and Cheap, Cheap….what is that noise?  Birds talking to one another?  Which one is it the robin or the sparrow maybe the blackbird?  Now instead of counting sheep I am counting birds.  

Then you hear tweeting and more tweeting and the same cheeping and some chirping over and over again.  Now you are turning and tossing putting the pillow over your head an still, you hear that incessant sound.  It will not go away and it becomes louder and louder. You do not want to open your eyes because you will never get back to sleep. How could sleep take over when you have the tweeting that never ends?  It reminds me of some wind up toy and the jabbering is driving me insane.  You just lie there thinking will it ever stop?

I guess what I want to know is this one particular bird outside my window or is it thousands of birds tweeting simultaneously with the same tweet.  Where did all these birds come from and why are they so annoying before dawn and why have they moved into my neighborhood?

I do not need an alarm clock because I have my own personal tweet wake up call.  It is like reveille at the aviary.   

I want to open my window and begin tweeting too. All I can hear is one chirping and tweeting after another. I cannot believe that one bird can be so loud.  I figure maybe that this bird will knock it off soon; there has been enough chirping and tweeting going on for this guy to have gotten his messages by now. 

At this point, I want to be Simon and tell this bird he cannot sing and that his singing is annoying and to go back and get some shuteye.  I can understand why no other birds are singing back to this bird because this bird is obnoxious. This bird doesn’t wait for a response from any other birds but just keeps tweeting. He acts like he is the bird dog of all birds.  Watch out girlie birds!  Does he know all the other birds are trying to sleep too?

I have a feeling if I went to the window this bird would be gazing at me along with all his fellow aviators.  They know I am annoyed and now the tweets and chirps get louder in that same irritating monotone.  This twittering has to stop!

Of course, now I am ready to scream my head off.  What is up with these birds?  There is no shortage of birds in my neighborhood and they are all working overtime to annoy me. The infernal twittering continues until my feet hit the floor and I get up.  The birds know this because once I am up the tweeting and chirping and singing stops!

Now you probably hear them all through the day but not like in the morning. What is amazing to me is you hear them begin at dusk with the same litany of that tweeting. I think it is the same bird or birds with their melodious shrieking unless my ear for tweeting is just getting better.  I recognize that tweet!

What I want to know is where do all the birds go at night?  You are brought to life at 4:30 am with that annoying continuous tweeting and loud ruckus of singing and then at night right before it gets dark you hear that infernal sound again and then it’s quiet. I wonder where all the birds go.  Are they just hiding out in the bushes and trees and we just do not see them.  

I do not want to sound paranoid but they can see me and I know they are there too just waiting for dawn to appear.  Talk about internal clocks.  They know right before dawn they are to begin again with that continuous twittering and chirping that drives me nuts.

I know now that if I do not hear the birds tweeting and peeping at dawn that it must be winter or for that matter maybe I have died…